The Sacrifice - A short story by.gotrocks
This story was submitted for nym's story contest. It didnt win but thats ok because i pulled it out of nowhere on the last day of the contest (which is when i saw the post or i would have put more thought into this..doh). But I ended up really liking the story for the most part, and i hope you enjoy too! Please leave comments and criticism below! (good or bad!) Excuse the typos, done on my cell phone!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
gotrocks420
The sacrifice:
The clash of steel rang all around him. Torak ducked under a vicious cut. The skeleton in front of him didn't have time to react before the flat of Torak's axe smashed it into a hundred pieces. He spun right, cleaving two more at the waist in one blow. The tide of bone was endless, and the small Ursan warrior company was few in number. Torak knew they could not hope to hold out much longer. The thought of his ursan brothers being defiled by these undead abominations made the bile rise in his throat. Not today bone walkers, he thought.
The anger exploded inside him, sending him into frenzy. He leapt into the air and threw all his might into the ground. The skeletons around him were thrown off their feet, and for a moment, he could yell at his men.
"Go! Now! You must get word to Balefort Castle! The undead approach!"
"But sir -"
"I will hold them here until you get back" The mad glint in the Captain's eye told the soldier he needed to go. Bones and swords were pressing in from all sides, and the group took off running, each one knowing they'd never see their friend and commander again. Torak turned and grinned at the horde in front of him, rage coursing through his veins. In one swing he shattered the nearest three to pieces, and he followed his momentum, sending another blow crashing through the ones to his left. A primal, blood curdling howl erupted from his throat. He leapt up, his axe singing as it sliced impossibly fast through the air, cleaving more bone and armor as it did so.
There are so many, he thought, his axe doing its dance of death in a flurry around him. For every one he felled, two more leapt to take its place, but he had succeeded in his goal. His men had escaped, and would bring word to the castle so they wouldnt be caught unawares. These undead were not just reanimated bone. They moved fast, and they were smart. Torak whirled through them, a blur of blue steel and fragmented bone. The tide pressed on, and he was tiring. Even if I slay a thousand I will be lost, he thought. A swift slash from behind penetrated deep into his armor, a thousand cuts into the metal had already been made, and the next attack tore into his back. He swung around, his axe shattering his attacker. A sharp pain in his knee brought him to the ground, a sword had pierced a weakpoint in his armor. He wrenched his leg free and cut the nearest one clean in half, splitting bone from head to groin. He took a step forward, but crumpled when he put weight on his wounded leg. A blow struck his helmet and his head was suddenly ringing, which numbed the pain of more attacks piercing him from all sides. His last thought was a happy one, knowing he had saved Balefort from certain doom. They'd have time to prepare for this massive host, numbering in the tens of thousands. Then a sword split his head in two, and his world faded to black.
Hope you enjoyed the story
I really tried to capture the chaos of combat in the flow of the writing. You'll also notice I had wondered what various skills might look like if a bear were actually performing them. Rage is presented in the very beginning when Torak starts tearing his enemies apart, followed by a Stomp that allows his brothers-in-arms to get away. Finally you can see a Hell Scream when he lets loose his howl, and a Super Mega Slash when he leaps into the air and brings his axe down.
Short story writing is always the most difficult, especially 500 words or less (not much room to develop...well, anything. Characters, setting, and plot end as soon as they are presented) so this contest was a great challenge to my skill as a writer. I think I wrote something I am really proud of, despite losing the contest. I hope you like reading it as much as I liked writing it!
I can't draw, im terrible at any art form except this, so I give it my all! :)
