Btw u can pm me your jokes and stuff also, I'm going to decide the winners on Friday, i will pm the winner
Btw u can pm me your jokes and stuff also, I'm going to decide the winners on Friday, i will pm the winner
i like turtles
AL: Jiig PL: Jig 80
Veni Vidi Vici
Worst thing I could be, is the same as everyone
When does this contest end?
Soo, does this end today?
Doodlebeast, Onyxbleak, Magnabeam, Vacuole
I bes ping
Ya know it will end on Wednesday, btw darker, those are some pretty weird jokes... No offense
I have the best joke.
Everyone'sFavMage.
(Not my original joke, just want to point that out before I begin.)
A German man, a French man, and an American man are flying around the world. When they pass over their home countries, they each drop something over their country to show that they had been there.
When the American passes over America, he drops an apple. He says, "I drop this apple for luck and prosperity for the people of my country."
When the Frenchman passes over France, he drops an orange. He says, "I drop this orange for luck and prosperity for the people of my country."
When the German passes over Germany, he drops a BOMB. He says, "I hate my country, I hate my life, and no one deserves to be happy."
The men return to their respective countries.
When the American returns to America, he finds a young boy crying. He asks, "Why do you cry, young boy?" The boy replies, "An apple fell from the sky and struck my mother dead." He is saddened and regrets his decision.
When the Frenchman returns to France, he finds a woman crying. He asks, "Why are you crying?" She replies, "My husband was killed by an orange that fell from the sky." He is saddened and regrets his decision.
When the German returns to Germany, he finds a grown man laughing. The German asks, "Why are you LAUGHING!? I dropped a bomb on this country!"
The man, with tears in his eyes, replies, "I farted and my house blew up."
Last edited by lightzone; 12-29-2013 at 11:16 PM. Reason: Crappy joke
My final entry and with a few moar jokes! ( I liek jokes. )
Joke pic 1 :
Joke 2 :
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money. he sits down and asks the bartender whats the jar full of money for. the bartender says well I have a horse outback that you have to try and make laugh...and if you can you get all the money, but I have to tell you no one has done it before, so I doubt that you can. the guy takes him up on his bet walks to the back where the horse is and the next thing you know the horse starts laughing, the guy walks out with the money.
A couple weeks later the guy comes back into the bar and sees that another jar of money is out and walks over to the bartender and says "Oh you haven't learned your lesson" the bartender say "no, I have. Now you have to make the horse cry." the guy says "No problem" walks over to the horse and a few seconds later the horse starts crying.
this time the bartenders says I will buy you a drink and then some, if you just tell me how you did it. the guy goes "easy, First to make him laugh I said I have a bigger penis then him, for the Second time I showed him."
Joke 3 :
Here's my joke submission:
A blonde recently moved into her new apartment and decided to buy a Microwave.
She goes to the store and asks the salesman about the Microwave. The salesman says "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes"
The blonde leaves the store.
The next day, the blonde puts on a brunett wig. Goes to the same store with the same salesperson, and asks how much the microwave costs.
Again, the salesman replies "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes"
The blonde was in awe at how the salesman figured out how she was blonde, since she was wearing a wig.
The blonde decided to go all out, She got plastic surgery and dyed her hair brunett..
She went back to the store and asked about the Microwave.
The salesman gave her the same response.
Furious, the blonde yelled. "I got plastic surgery, dyed my hair.I completly changed my look, how the hell do you know I'm a blonde?
The salesman looked at her and said "Because you dumb bitch thats not a microwave, its a ****ing dishwasher!
Final joke :
When I was younger, I hated going to weddings. All kinds of aunts and grannys would always point at me and say:"You´re next! You´re next!" They finally stopped doing that after I started to do the same to them on every funeral...
Hope you liked it!
Last edited by Doodlebeast; 12-29-2013 at 11:30 PM. Reason: Edit fo lyfe
Doodlebeast, Onyxbleak, Magnabeam, Vacuole
I bes ping
Doodle reported for inappropriate language.
;D
All for One, and One for All!
The Brightest of Flames..cast the Darkest of Shadows..
One who knows nothing cannot understand anything..
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