Even Bosses Get Lonely, Too Contest

[CanonicalKoi]

Listen! Do you hear that? That's the sound of lonely, lonely bosses sitting at home, pigging out on ice cream while watching The Guiding Light/Eastenders/Coronation Street/Home and Away (depending) and petting their goldfish. Do you have any idea how lonely you have to be to pet goldfish? Do you? And the goldfish don't even like it, much. They need your help. The bosses, not the goldfish though I'm sure they'd appreciate your help, too.

Lots of great entries so far, but I know there's a bunch more humorously romantic folks on the forum that could give a hand to a boss in need.

[javier995]

Listen! Do you hear that? That's the sound of lonely, lonely bosses sitting at home, pigging out on ice cream while watching The Guiding Light/Eastenders/Coronation Street/Home and Away (depending) and petting their goldfish. Do you have any idea how lonely you have to be to pet goldfish? Do you? And the goldfish don't even like it, much. They need your help. The bosses, not the goldfish though I'm sure they'd appreciate your help, too.

Lots of great entries so far, but I know there's a bunch more humorously romantic folks on the forum that could give a hand to a boss in need.

Yea seems like everyone wants to have the funniest MF one. I would like to see more bosses used personally, but not all the bosses have something funny.


Great entries guys! Keep it up!

[BodMaster]

Amazing entries keep them comments coming peeps

Have some fav's arleady, who dares to change my mind?

hey kirti.... why leave guild??..... -Eziocreed

May want to PM these matters not to discuss on thread.

[Zazel]

Name:Zazel
Guild: Heaven N Hell's Assasins

Boss: Mysterious Figure

Age: 100 years, give or take a few decades when im in a good mood.

Occupation: Professional fire eater, with walking if the price is right. Seasonally play as the grim reaper during Halloween.

Hobbies: yoga, im really flexible more so when i get my groove on. Meditating, to control my inner self, I have a bit of an anger issue but im taking anger management classes. Most of all i loved to knit while im waiting for a vist from my freinds Op, engi and comm. Everything I wear I have designed myself.

Perfect Date:In the morning we would start by touring all the crypts around the galaxy on my private ship. Have lunch while being served by some of my hostages in numa prime. To burn off what we ate, because I try to keep fit, a nice stroll along delta 7. For the finale a very exploding dinner at the shipyard. I promise you when were through you would say it was bang!

[Kakatoa91]

Was wondering,

Dunno why Mysterious Figure and Miner have the most entries so far.
Maybe people forgot there are other poor lonely bosses out there.
People need to check the "boss compendium".

Id like to write something else on other bosses.

Next time maybe you could narrow the writing competition to 5 bosses then next time to other 5... etc
That if you want a recurrent writing competition.

[javier995]

Was wondering,

Dunno why Mysterious Figure and Miner have the most entries so far.
Maybe people forgot there are other poor lonely bosses out there.
People need to check the "boss compendium".

Id like to write something else on other bosses.

Next time maybe you could narrow the writing competition to 5 bosses then next time to other 5... etc
That if you want a recurrent writing competition.

As I said above, I would also like to see other bosses. Although the reason those are mostly used is bc they are the hardest(miner is still hard if your in the lvl range). Both those bosses can't be soloed(again in the lvl range). That being said they're the most popular, I expected them to be used the most. I rather have it how it is. Narrowing it down to 5 bosses would not be fun. Some people will have funny ones about bosses not in the 5 that would be mentioned.

Therefore let them put as many miner and MF replies as they want. If it's funny, and gives me that exhale from the nose laugh thing(you know when you laugh in your head and smile then you breathe out through your nose? Yes that one lol), I won't mine.

All that matters is that they have fun writing about what THEY want, that's where the creativity comes in.


That being said, giving my opinion, I still have yet to see one that makes me LOL. Show me more entries! Lol

[javier995]

Bump! More people should enter this contest!!

[Asavadale]

Name: Asavadale
Guild: Fearless

Boss: Miner Mcguirk
Age: Have No Idea ( I Think These Squids Are Making Me Forget)
Occupation: SELLING MY 100% LUCK ENHANCER TO PLAYERS FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD!!! (WARNING: 100% LUCK MAY CAUSE U TO: SCREAM, SHOUT, THROW A TANTRUM, DIE WHILE CHATING, RAGE, THROW UP, HATE, GET HYPOTHERMIA, BE HAPPY, SADNESS, DEPRESSION, SPAM RANDOM STUFF, RELIVE UR ENTIRE MISERABLE HIGH SCHOOL YEAR, FORGET TO PICK UP THE MILK ON UR WAY HOME, AN ANGRY WIFE, GET ATTACKED BY AN ANGRY GROUP OF REVOLUTIONARY INTERACTIVE VISUALLY ENGAGING THINGAMAJIGS, STRESS, UNABLE TO TALK, STARE AT DEEPSPACE DAN FOR A LONG TIME TILL U COMPLETELY FREAK HIM OUT AND GIVES U LVL.36 HELM, FIGHT YOUR ROOM MATE FOR THE LAST PIZZA SLICE, SNEEZE, CRY, UNABLE TO SLEEP, I AM NOT FAT!.....I'M FLUFFY, THAT, LAST, ONE, HAD, NOTHING, TO, DO, WITH, 100%, LUCK, I, WAS, JUST, BORED, ARE, U, STILL, READING, THIS!, ALSO.......NO REFUNDS!)
Hobbies: Breathing, Watching The Gilmore Girls (I Would Never Watch That!), Watching Chick Flicks (I Do Not Ur Just Making This Stuff up), Arguing With Asavadale Who Is Trying To Get Him A Date (That's True But Stop Saying I Do All that!), Complains About Everything I Say (I Give Up!), Crying On The Floor, Makeing Baby Noises, Leaves The Room, I'm Lonely Now Ne Body Want To Cuddle
Dream Date: Loves Squids, Hates Asavadale As Well, Loves Watching Scary Movies (-Phone Rings- Hello) (SEVEN DAYS! -Hangs Up-) (That Was Weird), Killin Squishy Ops, Eating Nice Squishy Chewy Ops With A Side Of Crunchy Coms And A Dash Of Eng Juices

[javier995]

Name: Asavadale
Guild: Fearless

Boss: Miner Mcguirk
Age: Have No Idea ( I Think These Squids Are Making Me Forget)
Occupation: SELLING MY 100% LUCK ENHANCER TO PLAYERS FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD!!! (WARNING: 100% LUCK MAY CAUSE U TO: SCREAM, SHOUT, THROW A TANTRUM, DIE WHILE CHATING, RAGE, THROW UP, HATE, GET HYPOTHERMIA, BE HAPPY, SADNESS, DEPRESSION, SPAM RANDOM STUFF, RELIVE UR ENTIRE MISERABLE HIGH SCHOOL YEAR, FORGET TO PICK UP THE MILK ON UR WAY HOME, AN ANGRY WIFE, GET ATTACKED BY AN ANGRY GROUP OF REVOLUTIONARY INTERACTIVE VISUALLY ENGAGING THINGAMAJIGS, STRESS, UNABLE TO TALK, STARE AT DEEPSPACE DAN FOR A LONG TIME TILL U COMPLETELY FREAK HIM OUT AND GIVES U LVL.36 HELM, FIGHT YOUR ROOM MATE FOR THE LAST PIZZA SLICE, SNEEZE, CRY, UNABLE TO SLEEP, I AM NOT FAT!.....I'M FLUFFY, THAT, LAST, ONE, HAD, NOTHING, TO, DO, WITH, 100%, LUCK, I, WAS, JUST, BORED, ARE, U, STILL, READING, THIS!, ALSO.......NO REFUNDS!)
Hobbies: Breathing, Watching The Gilmore Girls (I Would Never Watch That!), Watching Chick Flicks (I Do Not Ur Just Making This Stuff up), Arguing With Asavadale Who Is Trying To Get Him A Date (That's True But Stop Saying I Do All that!), Complains About Everything I Say (I Give Up!), Crying On The Floor, Makeing Baby Noises, Leaves The Room, I'm Lonely Now Ne Body Want To Cuddle
Dream Date: Loves Squids, Hates Asavadale As Well, Loves Watching Scary Movies (-Phone Rings- Hello) (SEVEN DAYS! -Hangs Up-) (That Was Weird), Killin Squishy Ops, Eating Nice Squishy Chewy Ops With A Side Of Crunchy Coms And A Dash Of Eng Juices

Hahaha

(Note it isn't an LOL just a Haha keep 'em coming )

[Reddwing]

Name: Reddwing (my noob commando who still enjoys prizes...)

Boss: Hobo Bagguns!
Age:57 and three quarters, but I dont look a day over 30! Ok maybe 40...
Ocupation: Well, in the tough SL economy, I'm currently (and always have been) unemployed. Dont just assume "he's a hobo! He doesnt do anything!" IM TRYING MY BEST. (kinda)

Hobbies: waking up early to watch the sunrise in the Outer Limits, watching gung-ho, happy-go-lucky players come day by day to challenge myself and my folks for a chance at a vanity. (Vanity shmanity! Yea right!) "just one vanity!!!" they all plead...Unfortunately one slips out every now and then. (I blame Junky "Clumsy" Cash)

Dream date: My dream date is with anyone who can take me to a paradise (far away from Rich and dont get me started about Skinny) as long as they can pay for EVERYTHING. (Im broke) Please date me soon! Im a hopeless romantic! (mostly hopeless)

[javier995]

Name: Reddwing (my noob commando who still enjoys prizes...)

Boss: Hobo Bagguns!
Age:57 and three quarters, but I dont look a day over 30! Ok maybe 40...
Ocupation: Well, in the tough SL economy, I'm currently (and always have been) unemployed. Dont just assume "he's a hobo! He doesnt do anything!" IM TRYING MY BEST. (kinda)

Hobbies: waking up early to watch the sunrise in the Outer Limits, watching gung-ho, happy-go-lucky players come day by day to challenge myself and my folks for a chance at a vanity. (Vanity shmanity! Yea right!) "just one vanity!!!" they all plead...Unfortunately one slips out every now and then. (I blame Junky "Clumsy" Cash)

Dream date: My dream date is with anyone who can take me to a paradise (far away from Rich and dont get me started about Skinny) as long as they can pay for EVERYTHING. (Im broke) Please date me soon! Im a hopeless romantic! (mostly hopeless)

Hahaha this one almost made me LOL. Very funny I like the use of most the Numa Bosses. Nice my friend, nice.

[ArtStar]

Name: ArtStar
Guild: Sparkling Pwnies

Boss: Dynastar Assassin

Age: A lady never reveals her age!

Occupation: Meter Reader, "No time for the old in-out love, I've just come to read the meter!" I said that once, I think. It gets interesting sometimes. I also work part-time at a slaughter house, or at least I call it that. In the Rockfall Caves of Delta 7 I am always slaughtering le noobs.

Hobbies: My hobbies include slip & slides, hanging out with Jeff Goldbloom and Harrison Ford, killing "filthy booty chasers," oh and I play clarinet.

Dream Date: I dream of a skipped date, and we just cuddle. <3

[Mastercon]

Reserved. :-D

[javier995]

Name: ArtStar
Guild: Sparkling Pwnies

Boss: Dynastar Assassin

Age: A lady never reveals her age!

Occupation: Meter Reader, "No time for the old in-out love, I've just come to read the meter!" I said that once, I think. It gets interesting sometimes. I also work part-time at a slaughter house, or at least I call it that. In the Rockfall Caves of Delta 7 I am always slaughtering le noobs.

Hobbies: My hobbies include slip & slides, hanging out with Jeff Goldbloom and Harrison Ford, killing "filthy booty chasers," oh and I play clarinet.

Dream Date: I dream of a skipped date, and we just cuddle. <3

Hahaha good one. I liked the part I put in bold the most.

[CanonicalKoi]

*checks calendar, confirms time is slipping away*

*can't get Steve Miller tune out of head. bangs head on wall a few times*

Time's running out! ("Time keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping into the fuuuutuuuurrrre...." Arrgh! Go away!) Save me from the tune stuck in my head and post some more entries--make those judges work!

[javier995]

Make me work my lungs for air! Make me laugh so hard I cannot breathe! Make me wish I never read your post bc it was too darn funny and I can't stop laughing! Do it I dare you.

[BodMaster]

Can someone tell me the names of the two twin bosses on SY4? I will erase this post and post an entry after a reply.

Dos & Caras

[Kahlua]

Before I begin, this is written from Caras, but the red font is Dos, played as his brother. It's him yelling in the background as if this was a video online dating profile.


Name: Kahlua
Guild: Sparkling Pwnies

Boss: Caras

Age: 21 ((YA MAYBE 10 YEARS AGO YOU WERE) Be quiet, Dos! Ok fine I'm thir....27.

Occupation: I'm a Nuclear Scientist with a knack for controlling explosions! ((YA MIGHT WANT TO WORK ON THAT IN THE BATHROOM NOW!) WOULD YOU GET OUT OF HERE. Sorry, so yes I work with reactors and maintaining their stability. Wouldn't want a meltdown now, would we!! (MIGHT WANT LEAVE OUT WHAT YOU DID AT CHERNOBYL THEN!) Enough out of you!!! It's a hard job with long tedious hours, but someone's got to pay the bills.

Hobbies: Life isn't all fun and games working for an evil cult set on world domination (YOU'RE ONLY THE JANITOR!!)....ANYWAYS as I was saying, I enjoy literature, fine dining, and catering to a woman's needs. I like weight lifting; staying in shape is priority number 1 for this muscle man. I also volunteer down at the local soup kitchen. Nothing makes me feel warm inside like helping others. (NO IT'S PROBABLY FROM ALL THAT SOUP YOU EAT). That noise? Oh that was nothing. Just my brother, Dos. His name isn't even Dos...it's Kevin. He thought Dos was more edgy ((BETTER THAN YOU'RE NAME, BART! OH I MEAN, CARAS, MY MISTAKE!!! Just ignore him and he'll go away. SO, my other hobbies include space fishing (you'll have to see it to believe it), crashing my father's spaceships, spending my father's money (would love to spend that money on you, ladies), and (THIS IS BORING WHEN'S MY TURN?)....and BEING AWAY FROM MY BROTHER.

Dream Date: Picture this; romantic candlelit dinner, just myself and a woman, with beautiful violin and piano music played by the best orchestra money can buy. We'll share stories of our past, present, and future, and our eyes will meet with an explosion of silent passion. Dinner will be followed with a stroll down a boardwalk, overlooking the nebulas and alien planets of our solar system, listening to the artificial wave simulator, enjoying each other's company (SAP-CITY HOLY COW ARE YOU SERIOUS WITH THIS?? BEER AND WINGS! BEER. AND. WINGS! YOU SOUND LIKE YOU JUST READ 'HOW TO BE A TOTAL DATE DWEEB') YOU SOUND LIKE AN IMMATURE BOY WHO NEVER WENT TO COLLEGE! (...your mom goes to college) MY MOM IS YOUR MOM. WE'RE BROTHERS. TWIN. BROTHERS. Ok yeah...so that's my profile...if you're interested, please contact me at SpaceStudCaras@starmail.com (SPACESTUD!?!? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! MOM! MOM!!! BART'S EMAIL IS SPACESTUD LOLOLOL).......*sigh*

[javier995]

Before I begin, this is written from Caras, but the red font is Dos, played as his brother. It's him yelling in the background as if this was a video online dating profile.


Name: Kahlua
Guild: Sparkling Pwnies

Boss: Caras

Age: 21 ((YA MAYBE 10 YEARS AGO YOU WERE) Be quiet, Dos! Ok fine I'm thir....27.

Occupation: I'm a Nuclear Scientist with a knack for controlling explosions! ((YA MIGHT WANT TO WORK ON THAT IN THE BATHROOM NOW!) WOULD YOU GET OUT OF HERE. Sorry, so yes I work with reactors and maintaining their stability. Wouldn't want a meltdown now, would we!! (MIGHT WANT LEAVE OUT WHAT YOU DID AT CHERNOBYL THEN!) Enough out of you!!! It's a hard job with long tedious hours, but someone's got to pay the bills.

Hobbies: Life isn't all fun and games working for an evil cult set on world domination (YOU'RE ONLY THE JANITOR!!)....ANYWAYS as I was saying, I enjoy literature, fine dining, and catering to a woman's needs. I like weight lifting; staying in shape is priority number 1 for this muscle man. I also volunteer down at the local soup kitchen. Nothing makes me feel warm inside like helping others. (NO IT'S PROBABLY FROM ALL THAT SOUP YOU EAT). That noise? Oh that was nothing. Just my brother, Dos. His name isn't even Dos...it's Kevin. He thought Dos was more edgy ((BETTER THAN YOU'RE NAME, BART! OH I MEAN, CARAS, MY MISTAKE!!! Just ignore him and he'll go away. SO, my other hobbies include space fishing (you'll have to see it to believe it), crashing my father's spaceships, spending my father's money (would love to spend that money on you, ladies), and (THIS IS BORING WHEN'S MY TURN?)....and BEING AWAY FROM MY BROTHER.

Dream Date: Picture this; romantic candlelit dinner, just myself and a woman, with beautiful violin and piano music played by the best orchestra money can buy. We'll share stories of our past, present, and future, and our eyes will meet with an explosion of silent passion. Dinner will be followed with a stroll down a boardwalk, overlooking the nebulas and alien planets of our solar system, listening to the artificial wave simulator, enjoying each other's company (SAP-CITY HOLY COW ARE YOU SERIOUS WITH THIS?? BEER AND WINGS! BEER. AND. WINGS! YOU SOUND LIKE YOU JUST READ 'HOW TO BE A TOTAL DATE DWEEB') YOU SOUND LIKE AN IMMATURE BOY WHO NEVER WENT TO COLLEGE! (...your mom goes to college) MY MOM IS YOUR MOM. WE'RE BROTHERS. TWIN. BROTHERS. Ok yeah...so that's my profile...if you're interested, please contact me at SpaceStudCaras@starmail.com (SPACESTUD!?!? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! MOM! MOM!!! BART'S EMAIL IS SPACESTUD LOLOLOL).......*sigh*

Good one.

[Ebalere]

Both those bosses can't be soloed(again in the lvl range).

Herc solo'd miner at level 17 i believe, and also solo'd mf at 35. Just sayin

Back on topic, let's see some more entries! How bout someone does.. Junkie Cash?