Supra, man oh man, the list of people I've lost to death is very long. They all hurt. The hurt lasts for a while, eases up, then comes back again and again. You might see in my profile that I like poetry. This is why. I often turn to Walt Whitman when I need solace. On 9/11, for instance, only Walt Whitman kept me going. Maybe for you it will be a different writer or a band.

Sometimes the pain is so deep in your heart you think it will never go away. But that's a good thing. If you didn't feel the pain, you would be some kind of crazy!

All I can say is, it eases up, but never goes away. So we learn to live with it. That's your #1 job right now. Embrace that pain. Know that it is because you are a man who feels love deeply, and accept it. It is a very important part of life.

I hope you make it to my age, and when you do you'll have seen a lot of really nice people leave this life. I hope you can find a means of coping.