When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris won American Idol using only sign language
Fear of spiders is arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards
Once the cop pulled over Chuck Norris....the cop was lucky to leave with a warning.
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook you can feel it
When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.
Did you know Chuck Norris had a role in Star Wars......he was the force.
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.
Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen. Seconds.
Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Chuck Norris does not have a middle name, nobody gets between Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it
When Chuck Norris jumps, gravity pulls a muscle.
When Chuck Norris plays scrabble, hjdldudhqe IS a real word
Chuck Norris got into a knife fight. The knife lost.
Chuck Norris finished the Never Ending Story.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris didnt have to watch the movie "Knowing". He already knew.
some have killed two birds with one stone... Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.
An eclipse is just the suns attempt to hide from Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once did steroids, and the pills got stronger.
Chuck Norris was bitten by a werewolf. When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
chuck norris once gave a box of his old watches to a group of kids. these kids are now known as the power rangers
Cancer gets checked for Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris made Journey stop beleiving
There is no CTRL key on Chuck Norris' keyboard cause Chuck Norris is always in control.
Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience. Death still won't talk about it.
People invented cars to get away from Chuck Norris, then they invented airplanes because they thought Chuck Norris couldn't fly.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Chuck Norris's e-mail adress is
Yahoo@ChuckNorris.com
Chuck Norris has never caught a cold. How do we know? Colds still exist.
Chuck Norris does'nt turn on the lights, he turns off the dark.
Chuck Norris can do a downward uppercut.
Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
Chuck Norris wears sun glasses to protect the sun from his eyes.
Chuck Norris Facts LOLOLOL
Originally Posted by Matutd
Found by me.
I'll make up one:
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